When It Comes to Life’s Biggest Commitments, Make Sure You Can Answer These Important Questions First

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By Alvin Martin

In two months, my best friend Philip will finally leave singlehood and embrace a life with less boys’ nights out and probably zero partying with hot women late into the night.

Yes, that’s how I see it. As one of the remaining bachelors in our group of friends, I somehow feel sad that our population has been reduced once again. But I am also happy for Philip because he is finally going to start a new life with the woman he loves.

One of the best things about getting married is the idea of taking your life to a whole new level. Getting into something that is totally unfamiliar, building your own family, and a complete change of lifestyle can be very exciting. However, there are certain things that you may want to accomplish first before you finally say goodbye to being a bachelor.

I suggest that you take time to reflect on the following to make sure that you and your significant other will have a greater chance at a happy and long-lasting union.

Get Comfortable with Being Alone

Have you ever tried living completely alone? Being all by yourself and knowing that you can’t depend on anybody else to clean the room or wash clothes for you can be a real game-changer. It  enables you to discover your strengths and weaknesses and teach you how to be more responsible in life.

Also, you will not be capable of sharing happiness and love with your partner if you’re not at peace with yourself. So, before settling down, you might want to have a bonding period with yourself. Go to places where you’ve always wanted to be. You can learn a lot of things about yourself from traveling solo that cannot be taught anywhere else in this life.

In the piece “Why You Should See the World Before Settling Down,” writer Stacey Rozells explains how going out on a solo adventure will give you time to reflect on what you actually wanted to settle down to; or perhaps figure out what kind of husband you want to be.

I have tried traveling alone to an unfamiliar place twice in my life. I didn’t even have a map with me. So, I had to talk to strangers, get to know some friendly people and rely on my instincts to find my hotel and explore the city. The whole experience gave me a sense of pride for being able to find my way on my own. It also helped me live with some of life’s uncertainties.

Know How to Resist Temptations

Before putting the ring on her finger, make sure that you don’t leave any unfinished business. And I’m not just talking about exes or past relationships, but also with other things in life, like simple curiosity about something, as these things can be really tempting and could potentially interfere with your marriage. In my opinion, it’s always best to play it safe.

And speaking of resisting temptations, writer Rose Leadem explains how following your instincts to do something different and going against the bandwagon mentality can be a more effective strategy for your business.

Learn to Listen & Express Yourself

Communication is one of the most important factors in keeping your marriage working. So, you have to learn how to listen and express what’s on your mind with your significant other.

To be able to do these things effectively, you have to work on reducing negativities within you mentally and physically; and develop more sense of self-mindfulness.

Being more familiar with your own emotions will help you be more aware and considerate of your partner’s feelings, thus improving your ability to communicate yourself better.

Set Your Priorities Straight

You should be aware that once you get married, the idea of making your relationship your highest priority is non-negotiable.

When you were single, it was easy to just jump in your car when your friends asked you to go out with them. You could just pack your things and go wherever. But when you have a wife waiting at home for you, you have to realize that you’re not living for yourself anymore. You also have to remind yourself why you got married in the first place.

According to psychotherapist Dr. Tina Tessina, also known as Dr. Romance, making time for your partner is the key to building a successful relationship because it implies a sense of purpose. It makes your significant other feel valued and important.

So, make sure that you can acknowledge your commitment in your vows and be able to live with it on a daily basis before saying “I do” or else, you’ll end up putting your marriage in jeopardy and your future in a very stressful and unpleasant position.